(NOTE: Apologies if this blog just shows up as one great big pile of words. I’ve tried reformatting if 3-4 times so far with no joy)So, if you follow me on Facebook (look for Davis Storm if you aren’t already following), you’d know that there were two blogs that I was hoping to write in…
Checkout Davis Storm’s blog from this past weekend. Mainly because he blows smoke up my arse.
Recently, I found myself watching yet another ‘highlights’ video from an Australian wrestling promotion. As I watched I couldn’t help but ask myself a question that I have repeated in my mind countless times while viewing videos from various groups all over the world.
‘You’re really proud enough…
Midnight Nutrition:
250g Cottage Cheese
2 Tablespoons Natural Peanut Butter
2 Teaspoons Ground Cinnamon
drizzle of Sugar Free Maple Syrup
Slow digesting protein of the cottage, fat burning properties of the peanut butter and cinnamon, with a hint of cancer from sugar free syrup just to keep you down to earth.
Tastes like pure self-loathing.
Protein: 39g
Fat: 29g
Carbs: 19g
Breakfast…
4 slices wholemeal toast
1 tablespoon natural peanut butter
Omelette:
3 egg yolks
6 egg whites
smoked salmon
spinach leaves
mushrooms
garlic
63g Protein
46g Carbs
38g Fat
- Looking on the macros, it’s probably a little high in fat albeit being good fats. I’d ditch the salmon and peanut butter if looking to cut calories. There’s enough in the yolks
- Yeah I burn my food. Do something about it.
Chocolate Protein Pancakes (xCARBFREEx)
1 egg
1 egg white
1 scoop protein powder
1/4 cup milk (if you aren’t cXe)
1 tablespoon sugar free honey
2 tablespoons natural peanut butter
50g Protein
0g Carbs
17g Fat
I have less than 48 hours left in Japan. Feel a little sad. Thankyou to the whole country for being so awesome! Who knew that 2 months could go so quickly!? Anyway, some final thoughts…
Depending on boredom levels and how much time I have, I might start posting more diet/workout related blogs. I’ll often go back and read over old notes I’ve written that I had completely forgotten about, so it’ll be good to document this kind of stuff for myself. Until then here’s my current gym album playlist, which becomes the best pre-workout on the market when shuffled. After Mesomorph. Glorious Mesomorph (2 months clean, but the workouts are suffering).
Architects - Hollow Crown
Nero - Welcome Reality
Norma Jean - The Anti Mother
Your Demise - The Kids We Used To Be
Suicide Silence - The Cleansing
Austrian Death Machine - Double Brutal
Armin Van Buuren - Imagine
Casey Jones - I Hope We’re Not The Last
Comeback Kid - Symptoms and Cures
Deceiver - Deceiver
Every Time I Die - Hot Damn!
Terror - Lowest Of The Low
Carpathian - Wanderlust
Limp Bizkit - Gold Cobra
Orgy - Candyass
This Is Hell - Misfortune
Poison The Well - You Come Before You
I thought I’d write another blog whilst my body is covered in ice patches and Facebook is littered with cheesy Valentine’s Day photos of roses, or single dudes passively hating themselves. Life in Japan is still going well. There has been a short break between shows, which means more training time. It also means my body is breaking down more rapidly, but I’ll get to that later. I’ve had some great opportunities to pick Hidaka’s brain, especially when it comes to the boring chain wrestling that I get hard over. He’s just on a whole different level. Everything lately has been real lucha influenced, which is fun and handy if I ever return to Tijuana. Maybe I’ll repost the TJ blog soon.
This Saturday I’m wrestling Masato Tanaka which will be my first singles match here. I’m super pumped for it. I remember watching him no-sell chair shots to the head when I was 12. It’s crazy the way life turns out sometimes. I’ll be practicing my Sliding D evasion techniques in the mean time. Apparently I’ve been compared to Jimmy Snuka over here. I think my nickname is “The Australian Panther” or something. I vaguely heard the name mentioned during the Japanese commentary, but wasn’t sure how it related to me. Knife edge chops and leopard print underwear ahoy!
After working through 2 bad shoulders, the Zero1 guys said they would take me to have them fixed. I had no idea where we were going but we ended up arriving at the New Japan physio. I received electrotherapy, ultrasound, acupuncture and deep tissue massage, and thanks to wrestler’s status in Japan, didn’t pay a cent! Unfortunately all of said techniques did very little. Cool experience though.
I don’t want these blogs to seem like I’m all up on the Japan love, because I sure do miss Australia, but I’m continually impressed by things over here. Chocolate milk only has 70 calories yet tastes the same. Valentine’s Day is a celebration for females to give males chocolates. And not just their partner, but ALL males. Which means female wrestlers fed me chocolates. The way it should be. Out of everywhere I have travelled to, this is probably the only place I could see myself living in without going batshit crazy. Then again, maybe I already have gone crazy. Case in point; almost every day I’ve been feeling earthquakes. Only minor, but enough to shake stuff. Yet the locals don’t feel a thing. Weirdos.
My episode of Deal or No Deal airs tomorrow. Kinda pissed that I won’t see it for a while, but it should be fun. I’ve forgotten a lot of what happened due to nervousness (and selective memory) but I did put on a lot of wrestling holds during that hour of filming, none of which were planned or agreed to by Andrew O’Keefe. I was in the moment! I may or may not have cranked on a Figure 4 leg lock after he failed to sell enough to my liking. Hopefully editing doesn’t remove too much cool stuff. Like my constant Beyond The Mat and Titus O’Neil references. Ah I’ve said too much, just watch tomorrow!
The time was roughly October of 2002 and I was finally allowed (by my parents) to make my way out to Salisbury’s Monster Factory to begin my Pro Wrestling training with veteran, Col Dervany. Having been a fan of the local product for years, and having friends who had trained, I’d heard that Col liked locking nerve holds on unsuspecting victims that felt “worse than 1000 hot needles going into your eyes.” Well, I’ve never copped a needle to the eye, but the statement ended up being quite true as far as I can imagine. As I entered the building full of fear, I fondly remember Col asking me “have you done any of that other shit?” to which after a minute of deliberation over what “shit” that was, I said “I did karate,” having no idea what he was talking about. He then proceeded to scrunch up his face and in an annoyed tone “NO! That backyard shit!” to which I replied with “no way.”
I lied. Sorry Col.
Col did love his nerve holds, and I quickly figured out that if you make him laugh, or always keep on the move, you get off easy. Some were not so lucky. I’m probably making him sound like a malicious bastard, but this was all just a lesson in tough love. Col is from the old school of catch-as-catch-can wrestling where it was more important to be able to protect the industry via shoot fighting. He would always have a smile on his face while he stretched our limbs, especially with his patented finishing submission, the small package. Yes, SUBMISSION! Trust me. In fact the fear of this move was so great that on my 2nd training Col said to me “call Tony Stone a pussy or I’ll put you in the small package.” Without hesitation I called Tony Stone (my other trainer) a pussy. He then proceeded to hiptoss me for 2 minutes. Though as I left the ring, Col gave me a wink and a smile. This kind of confirmation was like gold and made it all worthwhile. There is nothing like earning your teacher’s respect, especially when you have so much respect for that person.
A couple of months into my training I went to watch a Maximum Power Wrestling event (the local company attached to the Monster Factory). There was a young guy throwing rubbish at wrestlers and was warned several times to stop by Col. He mouthed off at Col and then they walked outside together. Col returned and went back to his position, however this time with blood on his shirt. When I questioned him afterwards, he told me that the guy tried to fight him to which Col delivered a swift headbutt to the nose and knocked him out cold. Yet this story is only second to the story about how he was hit by a car, had surgery and returned to training in the same day. Old man strength is underrated.
Unbeknownst to me, Col was one of the only veterans left training young guys in Australia. There was a big black hole in Australian wrestling in the 90’s so most of the few schools in existence didn’t have the kind of experienced trainer that I had. In fact Adelaide only had 1 wrestling school at the time. I was taught so many lessons about respect, protecting the business and hard work, that I am forever grateful. I was told that I could be the next ‘Shawn McMichaels’ if I wanted to be. I still have no idea who he is, but I figure that he has a lot of talent. One of the early lessons I learnt was to not let your opponent “guzzle” you. It was explained to me that a lot of the more experienced guys are pricks and will beat you down in a match so you really have to fight for your comebacks. I soon wrestled B-Unit in a tag match and out of fear of guzzling; I reversed every move they attempted! I ended up guzzling the guzzlers! Thanks Col.
One of the proudest moments in my life happened just before the Monster Factory closed in 2006. Before a Joint Promotions show (the new company that took over MPW), they were giving out awards for certain things that slip my mind. Finally Col was to give out the “Col Dervany Award” to his best trainee from 1999-2006. I received a super shock when I won the award. I still display it proudly in my bedroom. As I said, there is absolutely nothing like earning the respect of your teacher.
On March 31st I get my opportunity to give back to Col Dervany for everything he gave to me. He hasn’t trained anyone since 2006, but has always come to our shows and offered support. It’s always a pleasure to see Col still kicking around backstage whilst I go to work. The NWA Pro is holding ‘WRESTLE REUNION’ at Cosgrove Hall, Clovelly Park in Adelaide. I am so glad and proud that we get to do this thing. I always leave 100% in the ring, but I will be making sure that I put in absolutely every bit of effort on this night. I owe it to my trainer and everyone who has been a part of South Australian wrestling history for the past 13 years.
Edit: Ok, confession time. I lied again. Col never put me in the Small Package stretch. Somehow I became the only trainee to ever go through that school and avoid that hold, whilst I watched my peers feel the pain on a nightly basis.
So life is good. Though I am sure my photos and blogging do make it seem so much cooler than it really is. I’m good at that. If I was to be real honest, my days consist of many hours of training followed by many hours of sitting and watching bad sitcoms while I ice my decaying body parts. Ah who am I kidding, that’s the greatest life ever! I’ve even been eating carbs. Bad carbs! Yet I’m at my lowest weight in years. Hard training will do that. I’ve been constantly thinking about the many things I miss back home, but I usually follow it up by telling my brain that I am a retard and I’m in mother fucking Japan, bitch!
I ticked off a long time goal of mine the other day, to wrestle at Korakuen Hall. It was an incredible experience, and whilst I felt a little rusty with my performance (as is almost always the case), I did enough to earn a few “OSHAAAAAN” shrieks from schoolgirls (and a guy in a suit) in the crowd. 2 long time goals ticked off! I really love how revered Japanese wrestling still is. Business may be down everywhere, but each night there will be several big shows within a 1 hour drive and thousands of people will pay upwards of $50 per ticket to watch. They dress nicely and are actually….gasp… civilised human beings! I received a big shock whilst leaving a convenience store near Korakuen a few hours before the show, as there were fans waiting for me so that they could take a photo and give gifts. It’s all very surreal. Hell, even a few members from huge pop group AKB48 were in attendance to see this gaijin sport the gold trunks! Speaking of which, I can’t get their stupidly catchy tunes out of my head. I blame Daichi Hashimoto. Kid loves his underage girl pop and waking me up with said rabble!
Training with Hidaka has been great. I’ve been honing my Jiu Jitsu skills and become the master of the Americana. I have now renamed it the Oceania. I even thought about competing again when I get home. 4 seconds later I realised what a stupid statement that is. Especially since the last time was when my head was ripped off in the 2nd round by a Wanderlei Silva dead ringer. Pro Wrestling 4 lyf.
The other day I ventured out to find a tanning salon because the world isn’t ready for my natural skin colour. I ended up dragging the British guy along with me and after getting lost due to not being able to read street signs, we found a tiny little place on the 4th floor of a random building in Shibuya. We departed with a stupid amount of money in exchange for a little skin cancer. Public showers post-tan seemed a little strange, but smart I must admit. The skinny guys walking around in white undies, staring holes through me whilst I changed, a lot strange. The mission was to not make eye contact and not make any sudden movements. Regardless, I got rid of my tanorexia for a few days so all is good again in the world.
I have quite the day when I return back to Adelaide. Fly from Tokyo to Sydney, Sydney to Adelaide, and drive straight to Bonython Park for what will likely be the best Soundwave Festival of all time. No rest for the wicked. What’s better than re-uniting with friends in the Australian sun and watching Fred Durst go through a mid-life crisis? My 13 year old self will have permanent wood on that day. Any flight delays will ruin my life. Unfortunately this will be followed by a return to Uni studies. It turns out that one degree isn’t enough to make some real money, so I have to get me a 2nd one. I do miss the lifestyle though. By that I mean bailing on Uni to sleep in and lift weights. Real jobs prevent this kind of stuff. Growing up is for losers. Peter Pan 4 lyf!
I also can’t wait to rehab my constantly destroyed shoulders. I guess hundreds of push-ups each day don’t help these things. Though on the plus side, it means I’m distracted from the tendonitis in my feet, messed up knee, sciatica, bad back and elbows. Sigh. Being an idiot, my plan is to keep damaging my body until I leave. Not like these opportunities come every day! Fortunately I have no bookings for a whole month when I get back, so I have plenty of time to get fat, and then back into shape.
Which segways me into March 31st. Not only will this be the NWA Pro ‘WRESTLE REUNION’ event, but it signals the start of the Zero1 Tryout held in Adelaide. The show itself is a tribute to my first trainer, Col Dervany. I may be wrong, but I think I am the last trainee under Col. I have a lot of thoughts to get down which I’ll save for closer to the date. I’m hearing of so many surprises for the night, and I’m sure I’ll be the guy marking out the hardest for some of the names we will see, just like I was in 1999 as an 11 year old kid at The Octagon! As for the tryout, there are a lot of wrestlers in Australia who deserve the opportunities I have had here in Japan. I can’t wait to see some hungry guys and gals fight for that spot.
In other news, some of you may know that I auditioned for Deal or No Deal. I was in Melbourne for an MCW show sometime last year, conveniently when the auditions were on. I then received a call back to be in the studio audience for some tapings at the end of last year. Fortunately I was selected to be on the actual show. The episode airs on February 15th. I’m sure I’ll be cringing at how nervous and sleep deprived I was, but I suggest you watch if you’re a fan of really corny wrestling moves on national TV. None of which were actually planned, might I add. I was just in the moment and the producers told me that I could test their insurance policy if I really wanted. Though a little insider word, I really wrenched one of the holds after the fucker didn’t sell it. Learn to work, kid!
Anyway I’ll leave you with some things I miss and don’t miss…
Miss: Eating chicken & broccoli out of tupperware containers, my girl, warmth, road trips, the chaos of interstate wrestling trips (even though I always have a sleep deprived pre-match moment where I contemplating what I’m doing with my life), coconut water, working out BEFORE wrestling training, being tanned
Don’t Miss: Jerks (everyone’s pretty cool in Japanland), not having time to sleep, spending money, having to tan
I crave donuts.
Earthquakes love this place. Twice.
Nick Diaz is a bitch.
Sincerely yours,
Ocean Neal
